Not Everyone Gets Access to Your Voice

A leadership lesson from Gates 8 and 20

Last week, I shared something personal in a community I’ve been part of for a while. Someone had asked for support, and I offered what I felt was a grounded, heart-centered response. Nothing over the top. Just a real sharing from my own lived experience that I thought might be helpful (especially for their nervous system).

And then someone else jumped in.

Louder. Sharper. They took over the conversation. I felt dismissed. I don’t think that was the person’s intent. And, that was for sure the impact as they positioned themselves as the authority in a way that made it clear my contribution wasn’t welcome. (I also worried about the person who was asking for support - but no longer felt I could find a way to provide the kind of support I had to offer.)

It hit hard and not because I wasn’t confident in what I said. It hit because I could feel the space itself shift.

From open to closed.
From mutual care to performance.
From “we’re in this together” to “I have the answer.”

My body knew it before my brain could catch up. That internal clench. The quiet pulling back. The question of whether I wanted to share anything at all moving forward.

That was the moment my wide open Heart/Ego center got activated.

And here’s the thing… I know how that center works. I know the old urge to prove, to explain, to patch things up so no one feels uncomfortable. I’ve done enough of my own work to recognize that pull when it shows up.

“Maybe I should’ve said it differently.”
“Let me clarify so they know I meant well.”
“How do I fix this so everyone’s okay again?”

And then, there it was. Later that day, while I was working on our weekly Recalibrate session inside my group of Rising Visionaries I saw it.

Gate 8 was transiting the sun.

And it made sense. Of course this came up now. It’s the gate of self-expression and collective contribution.

I was standing smack dab in the middle of it… expressing myself by offering something from my own lived experience, trusting it might be useful. I wasn’t trying to lead the conversation. I was just adding to it. From a place of care.

But what I got back? That had the flavor of the shadow of Gate 8 where the gift of contribution gets twisted into control. Where someone doesn’t just share, they need to own the space.

And my system felt it. What I experienced was a misalignment in expression and in contribution. One of us was offering. The other was asserting. And the room couldn’t hold both.

So yeah… it made sense. This was one of those clear, lived moments where the energy of a transit shows up in real time.

And that’s the power of knowing this language and why I love using it as a tool for awareness. It helps us understand what’s happening beneath the surface… so we can stop making ourselves wrong for what’s not necessarily ours to carry.

And then the energy shifted again. The Sun moved into Gate 20.

Now this one’s a big deal in my chart. It closes my small split and connects the dots between my Generator and Manifestor parts. Which means I go from feeling like I’m carrying puzzle pieces... to actually energetically experiencing the whole picture.

And that’s what I’ve felt this week.

A grounded knowing that moves straight through my throat without getting jammed up by overthinking.

This is mine to say, to feel, to experience.
No push. No proof. No permission needed.

And the contrast couldn’t be more clear. Last week, I lost my center. This week, I returned to it. Fully. Unapologetically.

That’s the thing about alignment. It isn’t some gold star you earn when you’ve healed enough. It’s a practice, a recalibration, a coming home.

And it doesn’t always show up as ease. Sometimes it shows up through conflict, sometimes through clarity, sometimes through silence.

But when it’s there... when it’s real... you feel it.

Your body relaxes. And you can breathe.
That’s the core of alignment to me… it’s the place we return to time and time again when life life’s or people people. Which they’re going to do.

This week reminded me that it’s not about staying in alignment all the time. That’s not realistic. That’s not human.

What matters is knowing how to recognize when you’ve drifted and having the tools, language, and support to come back to yourself time and time again.

So if you've felt a little off, a little tangled, a little unsure whether it’s you or the space you’re in, consider this your invitation to pause and check in:

Where am I?
What am I feeling?
And what part of me is asking to come home?

You don’t need to figure it all out, just start by noticing what’s real right now.
That’s more than enough.